My counsel to you, from a place of care and truth: WHAT YOU ARE CARRYING IS HEAVIER THAN YOU REALIZE,
and it is not because the pain was small—it is because you have carried it for too long. I need you to understand this clearly: forgiveness is not weakness; it is wisdom. It is not surrendering your dignity; it is reclaiming your freedom.
Right now, unforgiveness is acting like a silent prison around your heart. No one sees the bars, but you feel the weight every day—in your emotions, in your peace, even in your prayers. The person who hurt you may have moved on, but the wound keeps pulling you back to that moment. That is not justice; that is bondage.
You keep asking God for healing, breakthrough, and peace—and He hears you. But God will not force restoration into a heart that is still clenched in bitterness. What you refuse to release, you empower to control you. Healing begins the moment you decide that your future is more important than your pain.
Forgiveness does not mean what they did was right. It means you are choosing not to let what they did ruin what God is still doing in you. You are not saying, “It didn’t hurt,” you are saying, “It will not rule me.” When you forgive, you are handing the case to God, the only Judge who sees everything and repays righteously.
I want you to choose yourself today. Choose peace over resentment. Choose freedom over emotional captivity. Choose healing over silent anger. Start by telling God the truth about how deeply it hurt—He can handle it. Then, deliberately release that person, that memory, that offense into His hands.
You don’t forgive because they deserve it; you forgive because you deserve to be free. And when you let go, something powerful will happen: your heart will breathe again, your prayers will flow again, and restoration will no longer be delayed.
This is not about them anymore. This is about you—your healing, your peace, and the beautiful future God is still writing for you.
Pastor/Counselor,
Wale-Rich Oladunjoye